Mikey Rhino

"If You Call Mikey a Mouse" _{by Pelemus-McSoy
Based on the book If You Give a Mouse a Cookie by Laura Numeroff
Credit should be given where credit is due, yes?}

If you call Mikey a mouse, he will demand an apology.

When you feebly apologize, he will begin a stern but level headed speech about being treated differently only because he was not born human.

When you acknowledge his plight, he accepts your apology and asks where you two should go to lunch.

When the words recommending a great cheese job leave your lips without even thinking, Mikey scowls and berates you for neither listening nor understanding his plight.

When you try to apologize again, he will cut you off several times and become visibly upset.

When he becomes visibly upset, he will pull out his flask and begin drinking at an alarming rate, all while cursing at society's apparent prejudice against him.

When his flask runs dry, he begins to sob softly.

When you ask him if he's okay, he sadly tells you about how he feels alone and misunderstood in this world.

When you assure him that he's not alone and misunderstood, he tearfully asks why no girls ever want to date him, but instead seem to fear him.

When you finally have the courage to answer his question, you sheepishly tell him it's because he's a mouse.

_{The End?}